Twas the night before Christmas, two guests in our house
Had started to play bridge with me and my spouse.
"Please tell me," she shouted, "why didn‘t you double?
Twas plain from the start that we had them in trouble!"
"Tis futile, my dear," said I, taking no stand,
"To discuss it with you. Let us play the next hand."
"Remember next time" said she, using a frown,
"To double a contract that‘s sure to go down."
So I picked up my cards, in a down trodden state,
Then I opened 'One Spade' and awaited my fate.
(EAST DEALER, N/S VULERABLE)
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NORTH |
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♠ 9 8 7 6 |
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♥ 6 5 4 3 2 |
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♦ 8 7 6 5 |
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♣ - |
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WEST |
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EAST |
♠ - |
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♠ A K Q J 10 |
♥ Q J 10 9 |
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♥ A K 8 7 |
♦ K Q J 10 9 |
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♦ - |
♣ K Q J 10 |
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♣ A 9 8 7 |
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SOUTH |
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♠ 5 4 3 2 |
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♥ - |
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♦ A 4 3 2 |
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♣ 6 5 4 3 2 |
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The guy sitting South was like many I've known,
He played and he bid in a world all his own.
'Two Diamonds', he countered with scarcely a care;
The ace in his hand gave him courage to spare.
My wife, she smiled faintly, and tossing her head,
Leaned over the table "I double" she said.
And North, for some reason I cannot determine,
Bid Two Hearts as though he were preaching a sermon.
I grinned as I doubled, enjoying the fun,
And turned round to South to see where he would run.
But South, undistressed, not at a loss for a word,
Came forth with 'Two Spades'. Did I hear what I heard?
The other two passed and in sheer disbelief I said,
"Double, my friend, that'll bring you to grief."
South passed with a nod, his composure serene,
My wife with a flourish led out the heart queen.
I sat there and chuckled inside o'er their fix
But South very calmly ran off eight straight tricks!
He ruffed the first heart in his hand right away,
And then trumped a club on the very next play.
He crossruffed the hand at a breathtaking pace
Till I was left holding five spades to the Ace.
In anguish my wife cried, "Your mind‘s growing old!
Don‘t you see Six No Trumps in your hand is ice cold?"
By doubling this time I had committed a sin,
It just goes to prove that you never can win!
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