A BRIDGE TOO FAR

Two years have gone by since our lessons began. How can that possibly be?

But with 59 handouts piled up in my files, the truth, well it's right there to see

Way back in September two thousand and nine we trouped in so jolly and keen

Ignorance is bliss as the old saying goes, we certainly found out what that means!

The black ones are spades and the filly ones clubs, the red ones are diamonds and hearts

Four points for an ace, three for a king, very soon we were making a start

Tess had us playing the very first day, God, this is a doddle we thought

What auction, we gasped as she moved us along, that was minibridge you were just taught

And on to the real stuff the very next week, balance dhands were the thing at the time

We learned one no trump and how to respond and a thing called the Limit Bid Rhyme.

There were takeouts and dustbins,suit changing and forcing and new rules from seven to twenty.

Play high that means aye, so low must mean no. How come by brain feels so empty?!

You start with a SWOT and move on to a SQOT. Did I mention finessing and ruffing?

There are attitude signals and losing trick counts. 

If you play your ace you are bluffing, and if eight means its ever, then nine must be never

Then there's overcalls, doubles and more

Singletons, doubletons, voids don't forget.  Am I vulnerable? Yes that's for sure!

Then there's Styaman and Blackwood, Preempts and Cues, Red suit transfers make sure you are winning

Top of an honour, high low, lead fourth down, oh Tessa my head is just spinning

I must read my homework and take it all in.  Get more practice and play it on line

Did I really come last at our supervised play?  Oh well, I'll do better next time.

On this our last day we all feel so sad, that two years have gone by so fast

We've loved Friday mornings and had so much fun, we really hoped they could last

We've all made great friends and shared many laughs and now have a grasp of the game

We've a network of pals with whom we can play or join other groups without shame

So thank you dear Tessa for all you have done in your effort to teach us to play

You were patient, hard working, professional too, but still made it fun every day

With Hilary, Anders, Rob and the rest our grounding is steady and sure.  

You've not seen the last of us, make no mistake, because soon we'll be begging for more.

(Elaine Goodwin)